"Luck" of the Irish

A ventriloquist is telling Irish jokes in Davy Byrne's pub in Grafton Street, Dublin, when, O'Leary, an irate Irishman stands up shouting, 'You're making out we're all dumb and stupid. I oughtta punch you in the nose.'
'I'm sorry sir, I...........'
'Not you,' says O'Leary, 'I'm talking to that little fella on your knee.'


Brace yourself. I hate St. Patrick’s Day. As a near-vegetarian and an atheist, a day whose highlights are church and beef really does nothing for me. Not to mention the years of “Erin go Bra-less” taunts from classmates (and an unkind family member or two).


Somehow the corned beef became my responsibility this year. After some googling around (the Irish don't really eat Corned Beef and Cabbage!), I decided to go the way of the crock pot.


I was a bit worried about following a new recipe and ruining the holiday for everyone, but I think it turned out pretty well.

This was surprisingly simple to make.

Guinness Corned Beef: Open corned beef package and try not to vomit. This may actually be the most unappetizing food product out there. It looks like some hybrid tongue/liver/brain. Shudder. Rinse it well and trim off the obvious fat. Shudder.

Add brown sugar (I used 3/4 cup, don’t tell my Father) to the crock pot, and 1 bottle of Guinness. Place the roast in the pot, add the season packet and another bottle of Guinness, and then enough water to completely cover the meat.

I cooked it on high for 8 hours and voila. Served with the predictable boiled potatoes and carrots and sauteed cabbage.


Not too bad for my first go-round.